Let’s face it: there are barriers that prevent women from taking up golf as well as staying in once they’ve taken the plunge. Not the least of which is the attitude that still exists among some men.

With the recent Kelly Tilghman/GolfWeek situation, the golf world at least seems to me making strides towards quelling its racist history and reputation. Not so for sexism, which is still reinforced and even encouraged. The attitudes in professional golf set an example and trickle down to the amateur level. Allowing or ignoring it at the top just isn’t going to help. When women speak up about the comments or treatment we receive, we’re mostly ridiculed for having a chip on our shoulders or being “whiners,” and if we keep quiet, we just perpetuate the problem. When you can’t even win for losing, it’s understandable that women might want to turn away from the game altogether. But we musn’t!

Ladies, just play. Don’t let them get to you. Speak up if that’s your style. Let it all roll off your back if you don’t like to rock the boat, but play!

Golf is such a mental game. The slightest distraction can hinder performance and when you encounter misogynist pigs on the links, it’s difficult not to let it seep into your brain and mess with your swing (and score), leading to another barrier: frustration. Some women leave the game because the ratio of hassle to improvement doesn’t seem worth the time and effort. The good news is that golf manufacturers, retailers, pro shops and teaching professionals are recognizing the buying power of our demographic and are catering more and more to our needs. The avenues are there for you, you just have to persevere and not worry about the lack of fairness that such a barrier exists.

Personally, I enjoy golf so much that no “unfair barrier” could ever make me leave it. If you break through the barriers you experience, chances are you will feel the same. Which brings me to another one: confidence (or lack thereof). Many women feel intimidated at the thought of getting out on the course. There can be many reasons for this, and they’re all kind of inter-related, such as lack of athletic background, anxiety about rules and etiquette, fear of embarassment or ridicule, performance anxiety, and beginner jitters. None of those were ever a problem for me. I have an athletic background, I’m an avid learner so my knowledge of rules and etiquette surpassed most casual players rather quickly, I don’t have much shame, I thrive on the challenge of performing, and I love the feeling of butterflies in my stomach. But if that doesn’t describe you (most are mental and you could become that way if you wanted, but that’s another story for another blog), there are still ways to surmount these issues and get up to speed. Now that I’m thinking of it, I should do another post on just that topic. This one’s getting long as it is. The point is, lack of confidence is only a hurdle, not a wall.

Just this week, I had a conversation with a colleague that went something like this:

She: You’ve only been playing for three years? Did you play before and you only just picked it back up?

Me: No, I first picked up a club about three years ago.

She: So I can do it! It’s not too late!
(she’s younger than I am)

Me: Of course you can!

She: Well I love going to the range and hitting balls. It’s so much fun. But I really want to play.

Me: You should! Why haven’t you?

She: I’ve been told I’m not worth the tee time. (laughs)

Me: (good that she sees the light side of that) Ohh.. that’s just wrong. Get out there. A lot of the clowns out there aren’t worthy and it doesn’t stop them.

She: I’m going to. I’m really gonna do it.

Hooray! Another volunteer to our troops! Then the discussion turned to gear selection and such, which is something many beginners (women and men) struggle with. She, like me, is going to go out and immediately acquire the best money can buy that feels good for her swing. And get a proper fitting while she’s at it. Of course, this isn’t for everyone and most people would recommend some kind of starter set while you develop your swing before you invest your hard earned clams on the latest and greatest.

Now, this is a highly intelligent, confident and successful woman who has been at least somewhat discouraged from entering the game for some amount of time. And if I remember correctly, the statement about her not being “worth the tee time” was from someone in her own family! But she’s been having fun on the range and, never having stepped foot on a golf course, already has the bug.

Sometimes all it takes is a toe in the shallow end to make you want to dive in. It’s an easy bug to catch and the stronger it gets, the further you get from the hurdles in the dust behind you.